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[pronounced: pim] commonly used in Nigerian Pidgin


1: not open/closed

2: silence; a term used to express the desire for the absence of speaking

3: the absence of verbal communication; she remained pim during the debate

How accessible are you? In this day and age, it seems somewhat normal to make sure the whole world knows your business, why is this suddenly okay? I’m guilty of it too, I recently did a Snapchat clean out, removing anyone I didn’t have a close relationship with, because ultimately, I’m not too bothered about their day to day activities and they don’t really need to know about mine. It’s a lot easier to restrict the access you give people than to decide not to share anything. You don’t need everyone on your contact list to be your Snapchat friend! It’s crazy how much you know about people simply from their social media.

I posted some time last year about how I was trying to get rid of certain characteristics I had, one of them was complaining, I’m still working on this, but making a conscious decision to limit my complaints and think more wisely about who I bother to complain to really revealed to me who genuinely cared about me. People actually admitted to me that they listened to me complain because they found it funny or because it made them feel better about their own lives, not because they had any concern for what it is I was actually complaining about! So here I was, laying down my burdens and seeking advice or help, only for it to serve as a comparison list for the next person.

Stop making yourself accessible to negativity. Someone doesn’t like you? Don’t let them in on what’s going on in your life. Know a group of girls that are ‘hating’? Don’t let them see your struggle. It’s not a form of hiding your weaknesses or pretending to be perfect, it’s making sure that people always see you at your best, and sharing your struggle afterwards.

No one is inspired by your tears and sleepless nights until you have something amazing to show for it, if people aren’t willing to help you along your journey they really don’t need to watch as you travel. It sucks to know that there are some people that actually don’t want things to go well for you, but this is the unfortunate truth and the best way to deal with it is not to focus on them. Because when you give people the opportunity to focus on you, they can be quick to remind you of or even worsen your struggle.

So, in the simplest of terms: #StayPim

Tisha x

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