As humans we are extremely good at pointing out the flaws in others. We hardly ever think about our own actions and the negative impact that we have not only on the people around us, but ourselves.
A lot of people, especially in this generation, love to pride themselves in saying that they have never changed, but no one is born perfect so avoiding change is a form of self-destruction.
It’s never too late to change the way you think and behave but first you must identify the issues. This might be how you view yourself, your confidence, attitude towards life, or how you view and treat the people around you. Whatever it may be that you have decided to change or improve, write it down and make an action plan. How you do this is completely up to you, but I’m going to share what I have started to do and hopefully you’ll be inspired.
I hate the colour orange and I love the colour blue.
Each time I identify a trait/habit that I dislike I write it down on an orange post-it and stick it in my notebook.
Each time I identify a trait/habit that I like I write it down in the same notebook in blue pen.
Seeing the orange in my notebook where I often scribble down thoughts, important reminders and blog ideas 😉 encourages me to want to change so that I can quickly rip it out! Yes, I know, it sounds stupid, but trust me it has been working!
Seeing the blue in my notebook- written so that it cannot be removed- reminds me that I do have some positive qualities and encourages me to want to improve even more so that I can fill the pages with lots of good things!
I make an action plan for each orange post-it by asking myself a set of questions.
Where might this attitude have stemmed from? Often you need to understand the root of the problem in order to deal with it appropriately and possibly find out who can help you on your journey.
Who can I be accountable to? Sometimes all you need is someone to help keep you in check, a person you can trust to guide you and report to when you slip up that can offer support and advice. It doesn’t have to be a major issue; I’m known for complaining a lot, I have a friend who I decided to be accountable to and every time I’m about to complain about something unnecessary her face pops up in my head and I stop myself. I’m getting there slowly guys… bear with me and my silly stories.
What practical steps can be taken? I’m very guilty of keeping to myself, I’m not trying to turn into that overly social person that doesn’t know how to leave people alone, but visiting my flatmates a bit more is a practical step I am currently taking on to be a bit more social.
Does this issue have any benefits? The whole purpose of this is self-improvement, so sitting down and thinking about all of your negative traits is not the best idea, try to find the good in everything, including your bad habits.
How can you maintain the benefits? You don’t want to become a completely different person, some of the things you might view as negative are what make you you, and what makes you you is what people should appreciate, so be sure to hold on to the benefits of your ‘bad trait’. For example, (yes, another ridiculous example) I am somewhat pessimistic, I would say I’m a lot more optimistic than I used to be, but regardless, my willingness to focus on the bad in people makes it quite difficult for me to trust people, even my closest friends. However, when making new friendships, especially at uni, this has protected me from a lot of disappointment because I was reluctant to fully trust anyone too quickly; this isn’t something I want to let go of, but this doesn’t mean that my pessimism as a whole is a good thing.
All of these questions can be slightly altered for all the things you want to improve about yourself too- don’t make the mistake of focusing solely on your issues, sometimes a little self-praise is needed! #OwnYourSlay
This is just another idea I’ve had on my journey towards a new mindset for 2015 that I wanted to share with you guys. I hope you can take something from it.
Good luck on being a better you!