I tried to write this at least five times and each time I got lost along the way- the irony! Hopefully this time around I’ll get to the end. If you’re reading this, it means I succeeded in completing it. It means that I didn’t get lost in the sauce… not for too long anyway.
I think the reason I struggled so much is because I couldn’t write about not being lost in the sauce if I was still in that state: lost. This isn’t to say that I’ve found what I’m looking for, but I’d like to think that now, I am finally on the right path.
Getting Lost in the Sauce
It doesn’t matter what type of sauce you’re in, you need to stay focused and stay true to yourself in order to refrain from getting lost.
Finding your passion or discovering your talents for example is a great thing; finding new love, peace or sources of happiness is also an amazing feeling; overcoming something major and settling into a new way of life, free from old burdens and misfortunes is indeed wonderful- but all of these positive things can leave you (you guessed it!) lost in the sauce!
I’ve noticed this amongst the people around me, as well as myself. We find something we love, something we can’t possibly imagining living without, it starts to turn into somewhat of a success and everything seems to be going well. But then at some point, things don’t continue in the way they started and we start losing bits and pieces of ourselves, conforming to standards we never once had to meet and ‘experimenting’ with things we know aren’t for us because we don’t want those feelings of elation to subside.
I haven’t been very specific here with intent because there are so many ways to get lost in the sauce. But I want you to stop and think, just for a moment: am I losing myself?
I was lost in the sauce about sooooooooooo many different things, here are a few examples:
On my journey towards self-discovery, I tried many things in the hopes finding my purpose. There have been situations that have been uncomfortable and I would be lying to you if I said that in such situations, I didn’t “sell out” or sacrifice a part of the true me in order to cope with difficulties better, or when I was questioning where I belonged. (I have a post about belonging coming soon). I became lost in my quest for social acceptance.
Brief freedom from stress and burdens meant that I forgot what it meant to be hungry for something. I forgot what it meant to work hard for something. I was becoming comfortable in mediocrity. Soon I got so lost that everything became a chore. I didn’t want to work for anything anymore- I felt I had done my share of struggling. I became lost in mediocrity. But the truth is that as said by the awesome J Cole:
“There’s beauty in the struggle, ugliness in the success”
J Cole- Love Yourz
At one point, I also became lost in my goals. I had so many things that I wanted to achieve that I lost sight of the reaons. In my sixth attempt at writing this post, I came across a video by beauty vlogger Shahd Batal (unfortunately she has removed the video). One thing she repeated throughout this video was the question: “Is the cost too high?”
Is the Cost too High?
If I was losing sight of why I started something, doing things that weren’t really me for social acceptance or simply to boost my own ego, becoming obsessed with something that wasn’t in line with everything I believed in and all that I stood for: the cost was too high.
If I was writing because I wanted hits and not for self-development: the cost was too high.
If I was doing certain activities simply due to fear of loneliness: the cost was too high.
If I was forcing myself to do something, just for the sake of having something, and that one thing was bringing me misery, despite it keeping me occupied and following the path that everyone else believed was right for me: the cost was too high.
There’s a song by Jimmy Needham that says
“anything I put before my God is an idol”
Jimmy Needham- Clear the Stage
This is the greatest cost of them all: losing your relationship with God to chase the things of the world.
Recently God has been putting me in check. There is nothing in this world that God wants me to do that incurs an unnecessary sacrifice. A necessary sacrifice is one that makes me a better person. It is one that is in-line with His word and one that will ultimately bring me long-term peace. You will change as a person when you pursue certain things, this is without a doubt and is crucial to your development, but only if that change makes you a better individual.
There’s nothing wrong with chasing success in all aspects of your life. I too will continue to strive to be the best and so I will encourage you to do the same.
But at what cost?
Don’t let your impatience, envy or discontentment leave you lost in the sauce.
All the best,