You’re most likely reading Behind the Schmile..:) because you want to know my thoughts on self-development; well part of becoming a better version of yourself is having the right kinds of people around you, that means getting rid of those that don’t fit the bill. I am the QUEEN of cutting people off, or at least I used to be. In my short lifetime, I have learnt that cutting people off left right and centre is not the best way to go about life, but there are some people that REALLY gotta go. Despite this, there are also some people that you just need to be assertive with so don’t get too scissor happy!
1: Bandwagon Bola
This person doesn’t care about you, your grind or your hustle in the early stages but magically appears when the success starts flowing. They want to reap where they did not help to sow. Cut it.
2: Fault-Finding Fifi
There are two types in this category: the people who don’t have faith in anything you do and let you know and the people who don’t have faith in anything you do but stay quiet, showing passive support. It’s easy to be mistaken by the quiet few who don’t verbalise their negative thoughts, people who appear to remain neutral. But do not be fooled, if someone doesn’t support you, they might as well be sitting with the crowd that are against you. Relationships are meant to uplift you, don’t make time for bystanders.
3: Need-A-Favour Nevaeh (Heaven spelt backwards)
I don’t think I need to do too much explaining with this one, we’ve all come across enough of these kinds of people to know exactly who I’m talking about. I’m not referring to people that ask for favours everyone once in a while, everyone asks for favours; I’m talking about the people who ONLY ever acknowledge your existence when they need something from you.
4: Yes-Man Yemi
As tempting as it may be to hold onto them, these people need to be dropped, ASAP. Not only do they not help you progress, they most likely have a secret hatred for you.
5: Jealous Juanita
The ones that make snide comments about you, always secretly thinking about the things they wish they had instead of you; stop tolerating and ignoring it, you don’t need to wait for things to ‘pop off’ before you do something about them. Let go
6: Gossiping Gina
Giiiiiiiiiiiiiirl, if they are gossiping to you, please believe they are also gossiping about you! Do not be fooled!
7: Wannabe Watermelondrea
You bought a jacket so she bought it too, two days later you guys have matching shoes, bags and even wigs! She gats to go! I don’t even have a legitimate reason as to why, I just have a funny feeling about that type, I see you nodding your head, let it go!
8: All-About-Me Adjoa
She manages to twist and turn everything to make her the focus. This person has a way of doing things for themselves but manipulating you into thinking it’s for you. They don’t care about you! Cut ties now!
9: Two-Faced Tolu
Two-Faced Tolu also splits into two sub-categories as is her nature. The first: she doesn’t mind being your friend, but not in public. Homegirl is embarrassed to be with you, probably because she’s living a double life and you don’t fit well into the fake persona she wishes to show the world. You deserve friends that appreciate and value you. The second: she acts completely different around everyone else, you never know what to expect when she’s out because she is a totally different person. You only signed up for one friendship… Say goodbye!
10: Lazy Laquisha
Be careful and strategic with this one. As someone with goals and dreams (I trust that you have these), you need to be surrounded by people with ambition that will motivate you, but that doesn’t mean you should just throw everyone else out. The closeness of your relationship should depend on how easily you are influenced- you don’t want to be influenced by the wrong people, but you shouldn’t eliminate good friends because they don’t motivate you if you can very easily motivate yourself. So this one is more of a precautionary snip, not a blunt cut.
No explanation needed.